Proverbs 3:1 "My son, forget not my law; but LET thine heart keep my commandments."
In each of the first seven chapters of his book of proverbs, Solomon directly addressed his son and urged him specifically to value paternal counsel.
1:8 - “My son, hear the instruction of thy father.”
2:1 - “My son, if thou wilt receive my words.”
4:20 - “My son, attend to my words.”
5:1 - “My son, attend unto my wisdom.”
6:20 - “My son, keep thy father's commandment.”
7:1 - “My son, keep my words.”
Although repetitive, the words in chapter three slightly stand out from the previously referenced verses. He used a word in 3:1 that he didn’t use in any of the other previously referenced verses and this word offers insight into Solomon’s understanding of children. He wrote, “My son, forget not my law; but LET thine heart keep my commandments.” The word, LET implies permission and allowance. Parents use this word when intervening on behalf of their children who are in the strong grip of an older sibling – “LET go of your sister!” Spouses use this word when confronting their partner’s impeccable memory – “You need to LET go of the past.” We use this word when trying to get through a congested hallway or a congested highway – “LET me by, please.” The word can be used in a variety of contexts but it almost always implies some level of permission or allowance.
For Solomon to use the word LET within the context of Rehoboam’s response to parental instruction, he was implying that his son needed to give his own heart permission to obey his father. In other words, he said, “allow your heart to keep my commandments” or “permit your heart to keep my commandments.” Such an expression would indicate that a son’s heart is naturally inclined to keep his parent’s commandments. By choosing the wording of 3:1, Solomon seemed to be suggesting that Rehoboam needed to grant his own heart permission to do what it wants to do – obey his father. If this is the case, and I believe it is, then Scripture reveals an incredibly powerful truth for all parents.
What is that truth?
It is the truth that the heart of a child is naturally inclined to please his or her parent.
If you’re a parent, then you’re probably raising an eyebrow and silently objecting to that statement with conviction. “If children are naturally inclined to please their parents, then why don’t my children listen to me? Why does my son seem so uninterested in doing the chores I’ve given him? Why does my daughter seem so callous, so disrespectful even when I tell her to do something? Why does it seem so hard to get my children to do what I tell them to do?” These are valid questions. These are valid objections. Indeed, it is true that children are not great listeners. It is true that children are not obedient by nature. It is true that children are inherently selfish. But that doesn’t mean that the heart of a child is not naturally inclined to please his or her parent. In fact, these valid objections are precisely why Solomon said what he said to his son at the start of this chapter. For a son or daughter, it takes work to “LET” the natural desire to please a parent prevail over the natural tendency to be selfish, lazy and disobedient.
God has designed human nature with a strong emotional connection to mothers and fathers. Affection toward a parent, especially toward a mother is not a learned behavior – it is a natural instinct. From infancy, children look instinctively for their mothers when her voice is spoken. From infancy, children long to be held by mothers and hate to be put down by those same special individuals. At a very early age, children look up to their fathers and mothers. It’s perfectly natural for a young child to long to be held by his parent and love to hold that same parent. This desire to have and to hold father and mother is not taught nor is it learned – it comes natural because God has designed mankind in this special way. It is because of this natural desire that a child quickly grows to want to please father and mother. Children are always working for their parent’s attention so they can receive their parent’s affirmation. Children are constantly looking to make parents happy because children have a natural desire and affection for them. This is why homes full of children ring with statements like, “Mom, look at me!” and “Dad, watch this!” This is why homes with kids echo with questions such as, “Dad, how did I do?” and “Mom, did you like that?”
The heart of a child is naturally inclined to please his or her parent.
Consider what Solomon wrote in Proverbs 17:6, “the glory of children are their fathers.” To children, fathers and mothers are special. They are unlike all other adults in the world. They are unlike all other adults in their lives. Children naturally glory in their parents, especially in their fathers. This natural desire to please parents and receive parental affirmation never goes away. In Genesis 27, Esau is Biblical proof of this truth. He waited for the day when his patriarch would pronounce his blessing on Esau. Isaac told Esau that he would bless him after eating some of his fresh venison. However, while Esau was hunting, his younger twin brother pretended to be Esau and stole his blessing. When Esau found out about the stolen blessing, he wept and tearfully said, “bless me, even me also, O my father.” A grown man weeping and begging for his father’s blessing proves that a child’s heart is permanently naturally inclined to please his parent and receive parental affirmation.
You may be asking yourself, “If this is true, then why does my child seem so cold towards me? Why is my adult child so distant? Why don’t my children seem to be that inclined to make me happy?” While your specific situation may be full of complicated factors, the simple answer is that something has prevented them from “LETTING” their heart keep your commandment or keep your relationship. Your child’s natural selfishness may be prevailing over your child’s natural desire to please you. Your child’s natural rebellion or natural laziness may be prevailing over your child’s natural desire to please you.
The lesson for children of all ages in Proverbs 3:1 is to protect that natural affection for parents and “LET” it lead to respect, obedience and love for mother and father. The heart is deceitful by nature – it is desperately wicked by nature (Jeremiah 17:9). But just because the human heart is evil doesn’t mean it lacks a natural desire to please father and mother. Children need to “LET” their heart keep their parent’s commandment when young and they need to “LET” their heart keep their parent’s relationship when old. This requires character and inner discipline. By Divine Design, God has embedded the hearts of children with a desire to please their parents so as to give them the greatest chances at spiritual success. Because of the powerful biological bond between parent and child, a child is more likely to succeed when given godly parents because he is inclined to please them by following their wise counsel.
The lesson for parents of all ages in Proverbs 3:1 is to also protect this natural affection a child has for father and mother. Why do children seem so cold towards parents if they’re given a natural desire to please their parents? In many cases, it’s simply and tragically because a parent has given that child a reason not to please them. Sadly, parents are the ones who put a wet blanket on a child’s burning desire to please them. Parental hypocrisy, injustice, disinterest, cruelty, being too busy, being too harsh, a lack of care and love are all reasons children stop paying attention to the natural desire within their hearts to please parents. Adult children who are distant and cold towards their parents are never content with the status of that relationship – they’re never happy with these broken relationships because children always have a desire to please their parents, no matter the age.
Parents, we must capitalize on this God-given desire within our children for their well-being. We must protect, cherish and feed this natural desire to please parents by not giving them a reason to feel otherwise. LET us treat our children with equity and fairness. LET us shower our children with love and understanding. LET us give our children our ears and our time. LET us be honest and humble with our children. LET us be sensitive to the God-given natural desire our children have to make us happy. LET us give our children many reasons to follow us as we follow God. They will be much better for it and we will be much happier for it.
Posted in Proverbs Commentary
Posted in affection, affirmation, childhood, Esau, instincts, let, parenthood, Parenting, permission, Rehoboam, Solomon, tendencies
Posted in affection, affirmation, childhood, Esau, instincts, let, parenthood, Parenting, permission, Rehoboam, Solomon, tendencies
Recent
Archive
2024
January
September
2023
January
February
March
April
October
2022
January
February
June
September
October
November
2021
Categories
Tags
Rehoboam
Solomon
fear of God
health
pride
self-sufficiency
wisdom
1 Corinthians
1 John
2020
5th Commandment
Aaron
Abel
Abigail
Abortion
Abraham
Absalom
Accident
Accomplishment
Achan
Acts 17
Acts
Adam & Eve
Adam
Adolescence
Adolf Hitler
Adulterer
Adulteress
Aesop's Fable
Aesop\'s Fable
Aesop\\\'s Fable
Affair
Age
Ahijah
Ahithophel
Albany
Alcoholism
Alive
Ally
Alone
Amazon
Ambition
American
America
Amnon
Andrew Finch
Animal Abuse
Animals
Answered Prayer
Antichrist
Applause
Apple of Eye
Approval
Arrogance
Arthritis
Asaph
Ashamed
Athletes
Athletics
Backbone
Back
Balaam
Balance
Bank Accounts
Bathsheba
Beauty
Bedroom
Beecher
Behavior
Benefit
Benjamin
BestBuy
Bethlehem
Betting
Bezaleel
Bible reading
Bible teacher
Bible-reading
Bible
Biblical instruction
Big Mouths
Big Picture
Bin Laden
Birth
Blog
Boasting
Bonar
Bondage
Books
Boomerang
Boyfriend
Brutal
Brutish
Budget
Buffalo Bills
Builder
Building
Business
CA Rt 1
Cable News
Calamity
Call of Duty
Calming
Calvin
Canaan
Cancer
Candidates
Careers
Cares of Life
Casey Viner
Character
Cheesecake Factory
Christian upbringing
Christ
Churches
Circumspect
Clamor
Clinton
Clothes
Clothing
Coaches
Coach
College
Commands
Commend
Communication
Companionship
Company
Compliance
Conceit
Conception
Condemnation of God
Confession
Confidentiality
Conflict
Conservation
Contentions
Contrast
Conversation
Conviction
Cooperation
Corinthians
Corrupt
Cosigner
Cosigning
Cosign
Counseling
Countenance
Courting
Coworkers
Creation
Creator
Creatures
Crime
Criminals
Crooked
Cruel
Curiosity
Currency
Danger
Daniel
Data
Dating
Daughters
David
Days
Death
Deceit
Deceptive
Delilah
Delivery
Democracy
Democratic
Desires
Desire
Deuteronomy
Devil
Diligent
Diploma
Discovery
Diseases
Disease
Dishonesty
Dishonor
Dislikes
Divorce
Domestic Violence
Doorhanger
Dreams
Dress
Drink
Drug lords
Drunk Driver
Drunk
Early Adulthood
Ears
Eastern Culture
Ecclesiastes
Economic Stability
Eden
Elderly
Elihu
Elijah
Eliphaz
Emai
Emerson
Emmies
Employers
Encouragement
Engagement
Enoch
Ephesians
Ephraimites
Esau
Esther
Eternity
Evening
Eve
Evolution
Excellence
Excel
Exodus
Expectations
Expectation
Experience
FaceBook
Face
Faithful
False
Fame
Families
Famine
Farming
Fashion
Favor of God
Fear of the Lord
Fearing God
Feast of Purim
Financial Advisor
Financial Security
Fingers
Food
Foolish
Football
Free-will
Freedom
Friendships
Friendship
Friend
Froward
Fruit
Fumble
GPS
Gadarenes
Galatians 6:7
Galatians
Gamble
Gang
Garden of Eden
Garden of Gethsemane
Garden
Gender Differences
Genesis
Gideon
Gileadites
Girlfriend
Girls
Giving
Glad
Goals
God's Kingdom
God\'s Kingdom
Godhead
Goliath
Goodness
Gossip
Graciousness
Grammies
Grandchildren
Gratitude
Grave
Grief
Guess
Guide
Guilt Culture
Gun Control
Gun Violence
Guns
Gutters
Hagar
Haman
Hamlet
Hannah
Hard Work
Hard-Working
Harlot
Hate Evil
Hatred
Head
Healthcare
Healthy
Hearing
Heaven
Heaviness
Heavy Heart
Hebrews
Helicopters
Hell
Herod
Highway
History
Hollywood
Holy Spirit
Home Depot
Homeowner
Homes
Homicide
Homosexuality
Honesty
House
Human Nature
Humble
Humility
Hunting
Hypocrisy
Hypocrites
IRS
Ian Brady
Illness
Immorality
Inconsiderate
Independence
Industrious
Inheritance
Inherit
Insecurity
Insight
Instagram
Instructing
Integrity
Internet
Interview
Intoxication
Inventions
Isaac
Israel
Jacob
Jairus
James
Jealousy
Jeffrey Dahmer
Jeremiah
Jeroboam
Jerusalem
Jesus Christ
Jesus
Jewish Law
Jewish
Jimmy Soul
Jobs
Job
John the Apostle
John
Jonah
Joseph
Joshua
Josiah
Joy
Judah
Judaism
Judas Iscariot
Judges
Judging
Judgmental
Jury
Justice System
Kindness
King David
King Hezekiah
Kings
King
Know-it-all
Language
Law Enforcement
Laws
Law
Leaders
Learn
Legislation
Liars
Liar
Liberty
Library
Lies
Life Lesson
Life-Insurance
Likes
Lion
Loan
Longevity
Look
Looting
Lori Loughlin
Loss of Health
Loss of LIfe
Loss
Lottery
Love Triangle
Lowliness
Luke 7
Luke
Luther
Luxury
Lying
MLB
Magazines
Majority
Maker
Makeup
Maniac
Manna
Mansion
Maple Trees
Mark
Martyrs
Martyr
Marvel
Mary
Matthew
Media
Memories
Mentors
Men
Merciful
Merriness
Messages
Mike Tyson
Mindset
Ministers
Mob
Mocker
Mocking
Monarchy
Monarch
Monopoly
Month
Moody
Morality
Mordecai
Morning
Moses
Mouths
Murder
Musician
NBA
NFL
NHL
Natural Disaster
Naughtiness
Nebuchadnezzar
Negative
Nehemiah
New Tricks
News Anchors
Noah
Nobles
Numbers
Nutrition
O.J. Simpson
Obama
Observation
Obtain
Old Dogs
Olive Garden
Order
Others
Paint
Parenting
Passion
Pastors
Pastor
Paul the Apostle
Paul
Perspective
Perverse
Perversion
Peter
Pharisees
Pharoah
Philippians
Phone Call
Physical Appearance
Plant
Player
Pleasure
Policies
Political Parties
Politicians
Politics
Polygamy
Poor
Popularity
Portrait
Positive
Possessions
Potiphar's Wife
Potiphar\'s Wife
Potiphar\\\'s Wife
Potiphar\\\\\\\'s Wife
Praise
Prate
Prating
Preacher
Pregnancy
Pregnant
Preparation
Princes
Prince
Principal Thing
Principal
Procrastinate
Procrastinator
Profit
Proof
Prophecy
Prophet
Prosperity Gospel
Prostitute
Protests
Proud
Proverbs
Proverb
Psalm 21
Psalm 35
Psalm 37
Psalms 37
Psalms
Psalm
Punishment
Pure
Purity
Purpose
QVC
Questions
Rachel
Rage
Ransom
Rebate
Rebekkah
Rebel
Red Lobster
Reels
Regulations
Regulation
Rehoboam
Rehoboma
Relationship Difficulties
Relationship
Religion
Remember
Repentance
Reporter
Reprove
Republican
Reputation
Research
Resistance
Responsibilities
Resume
Resurrection
Retirement
Revealing
Revelation
Reward
Rich & Famous
Rich Man
Rich
Ridicule
Righteouness
Right
Riot
Road
Romania
Romans 8:28
Romans
Rulers
Ruler
Rules
Rule
Sabbath
Sadness
Samson
Samuel
Sarah
Satan
Satisfaction
Satisfy
Saul
Saving
Scale
Scam
School
Science
Scientist
Scoffer
Scripture
Sea of Galilee
Seasons
Seatbelts
Secrets
Seduce
Seed
Seek
Self-Confidence
Selfies
Selfishness
Sermons
Servitude
Sexual Chaos
Sexual Confusion
Shakespeare
Shame Culture
Shame
Shane Gaskill
Shenandoah Valley
Shoe Laces
Siblings
Sickness
Silence
Simon Peter
Simon
Slothful
Social Media
Social
Society
Solomon
Song of Solomon
Sons
Sorrow
Source
Speaking
Speak
Speculation
Speech
Speeding
Spies
Spiritual Security
Sporting
Sports
Sport
Spouses
Stanley Cup
Steal
Stephen
Stimulus
Stock Market
Strange Woman
Strangers
Stratego
Strength
Stress
Struggles
Student
Super Bowl Rings
Surely
Surety
Swatting
Sweat
Talebearer
Talkative
Talking
Tamar
Taylor
Teachers
Teaching
Teenagers
Teenager
Teens
Tendency
Tension
Texas Roadhouse
Text
Theft
Theocracy
Tik Tok
Timothy
Tithes
To be or not to be
Toddlers
Toddler
Tolerance
Tomb
Tongue
Tour Guide
Trainer
Transgressor
Travel
Treasure
Treatment
Tribute
Trickery
Trinity
Trips
Trouble
True Love
True Wisdom
True
Turner
Tyler Barriss
Uber Eats
Understanding
Unemployment
Unforgiveness
Unhealthy
Universities
Unjust
Unrighteous
Uprightness
Upright
Vain
Value
Vanity
Vehicle
Vengeance
Videos
Virtuous
Vision
Votes
Voting
Walk
Walmart
Washington
Watsom
Way of Life
Way
Wealthy
Weight
Western Culture
Winking
Wink
Wise Men
Witnessing
Womb
Women
Work Ethic
Worth
Wrong
X
Yankees
YouTube
Zechariah
addiction
adultery
advertisements
advertiser
advertising
advice
advisor
affection
affirmation
aggression
alcohol
amos
angels
anointing
ant
anxiety
appetite
argument
assumption
as
attractions
authority
background
backyard
bankrupt
battle
beginning
birds
bitterness
blessed
brain
bright
broken nose
buckler
campfire
cardinal sins
career
carelessness
car
cause
certainty
charity
chastening
childhood
childrearing
children
child
choices
church attendance
church
command
confidence
confident
consequences
considerate
contention
contentment
conversaion
correction
counselor
counsel
covetousness
criticism
cruelty
cynicism
dads
dad
darkness
dark
daughter
debt
deception
decisions
defend
defense
demands
destruction
determination
diamonds
diligence
direction
disappointment
discernment
discipleship
disciples
disciple
discipline
discontentment
discord
discretion
distractions
distress
doctrine
dogs
drinking
drugs
dying
ear
education
effort
emotions
employee
employer
employment
enemies
enticement
enticing
envy
equity
evil communications
evil men
evil women
evil
example
eyelids
eyes
ezekiel
facts
failure
fairness
faith
family
fathers
father
favor
fear of God
fear of man
fear
feelings
feminine
fighting
fight
filthy
finances
fire
flattery
focus
following
foolishness
foolishnes
fools
fool
forgiveness
fornication
friends
future
gambling
gangs
gender
gold
good men
good
government
grace
greed
guard
guilt
happiness
happy
harm
hate
headlights
health
heart
hear
hold your peace
holiness
home
honor
hope
hunger
husbands
husband
ignorance
illustration
income
inequality
infidelity
influence
iniquity
insomnia
instincts
instruction
intimacy
investigation
investing
isaiah
issued
issue
jabs
jewelry
judgment
justice
just
kidnapper
kidney
kids
knowledge
labor
law of sowing and reaping
laziness
lazy
leadership
learning
legacy
length of days
lessons
let
life
light
lips
listening
listen
little
liver
living
loans
loneliness
long life
longterm
love
lucifer
lust
man
marketing
marriage
math
memorization
memory
mercy
messenger
millions
mind
ministry
mischief
misery loves company
misery
mistakes
mom
money
mothers
mother
motive
mouth
movies
nature
necklace
neck
neighbor
obscenity
observant
oil
oppression
oppressor
organs
ornaments
parable
paranoia
parenthood
parents
parent
pastoring
path
peace
peculiarity
peer pressure
peers
peer
permission
personification
pleasant
politician
ponder
pornography
pottymouth
poverty
power
prayer
preservation
pride
priests
private
procrastination
prodigal
profanity
prosperity
prostitution
protection
protect
prudence
public restroom
purchases
reading
reaping
reason
rebellion
rebuke
regret
rejection
relate
relationships
relevant
remedy
remembrance
remorse
repetition
replacement
reproof
respect
responsibility
responsible
retain
retention
riches
righteousness
righteous
risk
robber
romance
rubies
safety
sailor
salvation
schools
scorner
secret
security
seduction
seeing
see
self-sufficiency
self-sufficient
serpent
seven deadly sins
seven
sexist
sexual sin
sex
short-term
silver
simple
simplicity
sinners
sin
skepticism
slander
sleeplessness
sleep
slothfulness
sluggard
smoke to the eyes
smoke
son
soul
sowing
spleen
spouse
stability
stranger
strange
strife
striving
successful
success
suicide
surgeon
sword
talents
talk
taxes
teacher
television
temptation
tendencies
thief
thieves
thinking
think
thoughtfulness
thoughts
thought
threats
time
tithe
tree of life
trust
truth
tv
vehicles
vice
video games
vinegar to the teeth
vinegar
violence
violent
virtue
virtuous woman
visual
voice of God
voice
vulgar
walking
war
wealth
well
wickedness
wicked
wife
will
wine
wisdom
wise sayings
wise
wives
woman
word of God
words
workplace
work
worry
young man
young people
young
youth